Dating is hard enough on its own, not to mention when you have children.
First of all, losing your life-mate (for whichever reason) is stressful and heartbreaking, not just to you but to your kids as well. Naturally, you want to save yourself from any potential future pain and you want to shelter your kids from all of it. Yet, you can’t stay single forever because, let’s face it, everyone needs love in their lives.
But how can you make it work?
Online dating has proven to be extremely helpful in these situations, and many Canadian single parents claim that it saved both time and energy (and loads of bad dates). Yet, even the single parents who have had a lot of success with online dating services say that they needed some adjustments in their lives in order to make it work.
Facing the truth and making your kids face the truth can be incredibly tough, but it has to be done – and most importantly, it can be done. There’s no reason for you to stay on your own just because you have children. Children are a blessing, not a curse, and you deserve to be happy just like anyone else. More than that, it’s often said that a happy parent means a happy child, and this statement couldn’t be truer.
So, how can you make online dating work when you’re a single parent?
Be Honest To Yourself And To Your Children
If you’re sad, lonely, and generally not happy with your life you can’t be a good parent. Your kids are your priority, and that’s perfectly normal, but you should be your own priority as well.
Be honest to yourself and figure out what you want and when you do, share it with your kids. Explain to them that you won’t love them any less just because you might have a person in your life that isn’t their mommy or daddy. Also mention that your potential new partner won’t replace them or ever try to do that. Children can understand much more than you think.
Make Time For Yourself
Do your research, check reviews and other people’s experiences when it comes to online dating, and choose the right dating site for you. The good thing about our constant connection to the internet is that you can take your online dating with you wherever you go.
Make sure to have some free leisure time for yourself on a daily basis, so that – when you’re ready and actually find someone suitable – you already have free time in your schedule for actual dates.
Take Your Time, Nothing Can Happen Over Night
You don’t have to stay with the first person you meet forever; you don’t even have to go on a second date with them. Acknowledge that finding a suitable partner might take some time, and that it probably won’t be easy. But that doesn’t mean that it shouldn’t be fun – and that’s what online dating does best.
Introducing Your Partner
If you’re looking for a formula or a psychologically acceptable time for introducing your partner to your kids, we’re sorry to inform to that there isn’t one, actually…
It’s all relative.
Some people introduce their new boyfriend/girlfriend to their children right away, while others wait for at least a year. Every option is good as long as you make it yourself after assessing the situation.